THE MAURADER'S MAP ADVENTURES
by cxvxs
Summary: Since the Sorting Hat has a mind of it's own, why can't the Maurader's Map? Or rather, why can't it have four minds? I'm terrible at explanations, look inside if you're curious.


**_You might belong in Gryffindor  
Where dwell the brave of heart  
Their daring, nerve and chivalry  
Set Gryffindors apart_**

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**Author's Notes:**This is based on the idea of the adventures that were had with the Maurader's Map. There will be some flashbacks of it being first created, of it being used with the original Maurader's, as well as what possibly happened after they graduated. This is a teaser chapter, meant to guess as to how Filch first came into possession of the map and how Fred & George managed to snag it from his office. All of Harry Potter belongs to J. K. Rowlings and I have meant no copyright infringement.

Moony is underlined  
Prongs is **bold**  
Wormtail **bold and underlined**  
Padfoot is _italic_

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Just as the Sorting Hat had a mind of it's own, so did the Maurader's Map. Or rather, it had four separate minds of it's own, for when the original Maurader's first created the map, they imbued themselves inside it to protect it from falling into the wrong hands. They thought they were just making a copy of their thoughts but magic doesn't work that way. What they did was much stronger than a simple spell. They created alternate versions of themselves that would be forever trapped within the confides of the parchment. The more they used the map, the deeper their sub-consciousnesses were embedded into the map. And so it came that when Filch found the it, the map had already taken on a mind of it's own.

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* * *

Filch had had his share of run ins with the Mauraders. What bothered him most about the group was that they seemed to know this school better then himself. He wouldn't stand for whippersnappers overrunning his beloved school grounds and taking charge. Not while he still had his job. He growled as he watched them laughing. He was determined to get to the bottom of their secret sooner or later. He vowed he wouldn't rest until he knew the truth.

Four weeks later, not quite a full month yet, and he was no closer to it than he had been when he first started stalking them. He happened to notice the little one, what's his name again, Peter something or other?, had left something behind one day. He'd been muttering to himself and had kept glancing nervously over at his position, as if he somehow knew Filch was lurking nearby. He'd muttered to himself a couple more times, waving his wand, and dropped a parchment as he scurried away like a frightened rat. Gleefully, Filch limped over to the paper and swiped it, just as glad to be taking away a student's possession as he was hopeful to gain some secret insight into the Maurader's mindframe.

"Using this paper for some sort of spell, eh?" He cackled to himself. He shuffled back to his office as quickly as he could, looking for his wand. He wasn't supposed to have one, strictly speaking. His position was similar to Hagard's but his wand hadn't been smashed. He'd claimed to have lost it and as he rarely had the occasion to use magic in the first place, nobody had pursued it. He dug it out of the hidden draw in his desk and pressed it to the piece of paper, muttering a spell.

**Mr. Wormtail sends his best wishes to the slimy, underhanded sneak that managed to steal something that didn't belong to him and hopes he gets golem rot.**

_Mr. Padfoot sends his regards to the disgusting piece of trash caretaker, Filch, and congratulates him on managing to snag this document. It was quite an achievement for someone who couldn't even walk in a straight line to save his life._

**Mr. Prongs sends his condolences to him, as his crooked looking face is a rather gastly sight to behold and it's such a shame that he couldn't have at least be blessed with brains as he lost so terribly in the looks department.**

Mr. Moony sends his compliments and acknowledges that he did his job well enough to get close enough to the secrets held in here but he best give up before he strains himself further. His small cranium couldn't handle it.

Cursing, Filch tossed the parchment aside. He was sorely tempted to tear it up but he didn't like dealing with magical properties like this. Besides, he wasn't even sure he could destroy it. He stowed his wand away and slammed the door shut. Glaring at the paper even as the words faded away, he left the room.

* * *

AFTER FILCH LEFT

_Mr. Padfoot gives his compliments to Mr. Wormtail. Nice going, Mr. Wormtail._

**Mr. Wormtail protests this as unfair. It's not his fault, Mr. Padfoot! He was startled and therefore dropped the map!**

**Mr. Prongs congratulates Mr. Wormtail. Way to grow a pair and stand up to Filch, Mr. Wormtail.**

**Mr. Wormtail portests this insult, Mr. Prongs!**

**Mr. Prongs expresses that he is unfazed. Don't whine to him; he doesn't see how Mr. Wormtail could misplace the map.**

_Mr. Padfoot impresses that Mr. Prongs has a point, Mr. Wormtail. Why didn't he just use one of the secret passages nearby?_

**Mr. Wormtail implores Mr. Padfoot to give him a break. Don't start, Mr. Padfoot.**

_Mr. Padfoot is unimpressed. Quit complaining, Mr. Wormtail._

**Mr. Wormtail entreats Mr. Padfoot to change his tone. Don't growl at him, Mr. Padfoot.**

Mr. Moony expresses his exasperation with this entire situation. Mr Moony says that is quite enough. He sternly requests that they all stop acting like children. Mr. Padfoot, knock it off. Mr. Wormtail, quit sulking. It's not like anything is going to change just because they're unhappy with the results of what happened.

**Mr. Wormtail utters his dismay. Don't turn against him too, Mr. Moony!**

**Mr. Prongs concludes Mr. Moony's got a point.**

Mr. Moony appreciates the support. Thank you, Mr. Prongs.

_Mr. Padfoot would like to interject his lack of caring. Well now what?_

Mr. Moony finds Mr. Padfoot completely unamusing. Now he waits.

_Mr. Padfoot is unamused. Lovely._

* * *

YEARS LATER

_Mr. Padfoot would like to express his feelings of boredom._

**Mr. Prongs would like to express his feelings of bland amusement at Mr. Padfoot's boredom. Quit complaining, Mr. Padfoot. It's not going to change anything.**

_Mr. Padfoot says that it is easy for Mr. Prongs to be relaxed, as nothing fazes him._

**Mr. Padfoot... Mr. Prongs does not appreciate the jib.**

_Mr. Padfoot would like to tell Mr. Prongs to eat his foot._

**Mr. Wormtail would like to interject his agreement with Padfoot!**

_Mr. Padfoot is not interested in Mr. Wormtail's opinion. Shut up, Wormtail. He expresses his wish that Mr. Wormtail would take a nap or something!_

**Mr. Wormtail entreats he's on your side, Mr. Padfoot~**

If anyone had been around, this might have been an odd scene. First off, no one was actually talking. There was the softest of whispers but it sounded more like a pen scratching out word than an actual voice. Moreover, the words were appearing on a piece of old, forgotten parchment in Filch's office. The conversation continued, three different hand styles appearing on the parchment.

_Mr. Padfoot expressly wishes that Mr. Wormtail not be on his side._

**Mr. Prongs tells Mr. Padfoot to be nice.**

_Mr. Padfoot scoffs at the entreatment. Nice? Doesn't Mr. Prongs realize who he's talking to?_

**Mr. Prongs begs Mr. Moony to say something!**

Mr. Moony expresses his confusion as to being called in on this argument. What does Mr. Prongs expect him to say? Mr. Padfoot is Mr. Prongs' dog. Mr. Moony suggests he learn how to control him on his own.

**But Mom~**

_Ha ha ha ha ha ha! He called you 'mom' Moony._

Mr. Moony is not amused in the least. Yes Mr. Padfoot, he noticed that.

_Mr. Padfoot would like to know the others thoughts on this scenario. So who's the Dad of this unfortunate group?_

Mr. Moony feels mild dismay at the continuation of this train of thought. He protests. Certainly not Mr. Prongs.

**Mr. Prongs finds the mere suggest highly unamusing. He is glad they are on agreement ont his point. He would like to add that Mr. Moony is much too male to be his wife.**

Mr. Moony implores Mr. Padfoot to quit laughing so loudly. He also would like to reply to Mr. Prongs. Who said he wanted to be his wife?

**Mr. Wormtail finds all of this extremely amusing. Hee hee.**

**Mr. Prongs finds Mr. Wormtail highly annoying. Shut up, Mr. Wormtail!**

**Mr. Wormtail whines highly at the rough treatment. Mr. Moony! Mr. Prongs and Mr. Padfoot are picking on him again~**

**Mr. Prongs is entirely disgusted by this display. Oh suck it up Mr. Wormtail.**

_Mr. Padfoot finds this all terribly amusing. Yeah. No tattling to Mom or else you'll get a time out._

**Yes dad.**

**Mr. Prongs is finally amused by this train of thought. Ha! You're the dad of this sorry lot! In your face, Mr. Padfoot!**

_Mr. Padfoot doesn't entirely protest this, although he voices his complaints. Hey, that's completely dissatisfying! He doesn't want bratty kids or a flat-chested wife._

Mr. Moony expresses his condolences to Mr. Padfoot. He's sorry he's not enough for you, Mr. Padfoot. He didn't want to marry a deadbeat either.

**Mr. Prongs is rolling on the floor in mirth. Hey, the kids don't like it when mom and dad fight!**

_Shut up Prongs!_

Shut up Prongs!

* * *

ONE MONTH LATER

"Hey, Fred. I think the coast is clear."

"Careful, George. It might be one of Filch's traps to catch us."

"Come off it, Fred. Not even Filch is smart enough to suspect us sneaking into his own office."

"True, true. It would take a mastermind to apprehend us."

"Now let's see what handy goodies we can find this time."

"Has he confiscated anything good?"

"Can't tell yet. I'll check over here, you check the desk."

"Hullo, hullo. What's this?"

"Nifty piece of parchment. Doesn't look dangerous."

"Let's take it with us. It might have some kind of secret code in it."

"We can play with it later. Now, back to making mischief. Let's grab some more stuff and get out of here."

"Yes, yes. Don't forget to grab those stink bombs over there!"

Neither of the twins noticed the four different hands appearing, then slowly fading on the parchment as they continued to rummage through Filch's stuff.

_Mr. Padfoot voices his approval at this change in situation. Looks like they might finally have some fun. Good, he was tired of entertaining that old git._

Mr. Moony expresses his complete and utter lack of surprise. Honestly, Mr. Padfoot, you're worse than a child when it comes to patience.

**Mr. Prongs also equally unsurprised. His only surprise is at Mr. Moony's observation. This is Mr. Padfoot they're talking about and suggests that they try to pit the twins against each other as entertainment.**

**Mr. Wormtail would like to express his relief. At least it's better than some idiot Slytherin finding them. They get to mess with our own House again.**

"Did you hear something Fred?"

"Must be your imagination, George."

"I could have sworn I heard whispering."

"Well, let's get out of here then if you're so scared."

"I'm not scared. Let's just grab the last of it and go."

"Ha ha, wuss."

Neither noticed the faded words disappearing as they spoke. They gathered up their ill gotten goods and snuck out of Filch's office. They would divide up what they had gotten amongst themselves later, once the coast was clear.

* * *

Final thoughts? Also, sorry about the rushed talking between them. I'll go back later and make it more like it should appear later but for now, you should get the gist of it. Should I continue?


End file.
